Cyclist Sues Strava for Riding into Brick Wall

Rolling News. August 19th, 2014.

Le Parkour
Le Parkour (“the course”)

While browsing through local Strava segments, a cyclist (who requested to remain anonymous – we’ll call him Joe) noticed a new segment next to his neighborhood. “The segment was pretty short. I figured if I got up enough speed coming out of my neighborhood, I could hit it quick and add another KOM to my list.” KOM stands for “King of the Mountain,” the top-spot on the leader board for a Strava segment.

Joe goes on KOM Hunts. He looks for segments that he can achieve first position on, travels to that location and then attempts to take the segment’s top spot. “I sometimes drive 30, 40, 50 minutes to segments. I warm up for 5-10 minutes, then I hammer the segment.”

Two months ago, Joe made his attempt to grab this segment’s KOM. “By the time I exited my neighborhood though this back road I’d never ridden, I had hit 32 mph, and I knew I was going to take this segment.” He says lowered his head and pushed harder.

What Joe hadn’t realized was that this particular segment was created on a popular local parkour course, connecting the two neighborhoods. The Strava record from which this segment was created was accidentally marked as a “ride”, allowing the segment to show up as a cycling segment. After a slight turn, the road ended in a 6′ high brick wall that abutted the back of the adjacent neighborhood.

Suzy Canowitz – walking home from the store – recounts what she witnessed. “I saw this cyclist going mach 2 down the street and thought that maybe he was going to hit his breaks and skid at the last minute or something. But he didn’t. I think he sped up! Next thing I see is he hits the curb and flies right into the wall, and his bike basically explodes. Damnedest thing I’ve ever seen. I figured he’d be hurt, so I called 911.”

After nearly six weeks in the hospital, Joe is now filing suit against Strava, claiming the segment wasn’t properly marked as hazardous. Strava would not comment on the pending litigation.


[*** Disclaimer: This is satirical post. I have no clue whether Strava is used for Parkour, or whether some idiot would sue Strava for running into a brick wall. But tell me that doesn’t seem only too possible. :p ***]